So for 36-40 hours a week I help bring beautiful little miracles into this world. Yes, I am a labor and delivery nurse, yes i LOVE my job and YES i have had my hand in more vaginas than you can imagine.
My job is exciting, its something new EVERYDAY, and it is very rewarding. Sometimes I dont realize how many people's days Im making better by doing my job. For all involved it is an exciting and monumental day. I forget sometimes when i am leaving at 19:30 dragging my feet and can barely make it to my couch, that i will probably be in many peoples baby books, their memories, and if Im lucky i might see them again when they have another baby. Nurses are one of the most TRUSTED people in the world. We are friends, we are confidants, we are a safe place.
Right now I am on the other side of the spectrum. My very best friend in this world, whom I have known since i was 6 years old, is due tomorrow. She could go into labor at any minute and i have been on edge for weeks. I have made a diaper cake, thrown her a shower, made a diaper wreath for her delivery door, and a homemade baby blanket. I have packed a bag just waiting for the call that she is ready to go. In this situation I dont want to be a nurse, i want to be a friend, a family member. I dont want to watch contraction or fetal heart tones, I dont want to take blood pressures and call doctors. I want to be a spectator, and i want to know that she is in the best hands possible. I am vulnerable, I am not in control of this one, and I am scared shitless!!
Last year my sister had her baby at my hospital. I did not get these feelings. I think it was because she was with nurses i KNEW. Nurses who trained ME. Nurses who i know were capable and trustworthy. She was with a doctor who i had shared amazing deliveries with. She was at what i considered a "safe place."
I am now a spectator. I now have to feel what all family members, friends, and others feel when their loved ones come to deliver at our hospital. I will travel to a hospital i dont know and trust that these nurses would treat my friend as would treat her. It has really made me realize how much FAITH people put in healthcare and other humans everyday. I have grown a huge appreciation for the career that God has led me to. Being a NURSE means... You carry immense responsibility and very little authority. You step into people's lives & make a difference. Some bless you, others curse you. You see people at their worst and best. You see life begin & end. You see people's capacity for love, courage & endurance. I hope that any nurse reading this realizes the lives that we touch each day and how people come to us with their guards down, knowing that we will care for them the best we know how.